i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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