i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
