What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
