No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
