How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
He passed out mid-signature
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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