He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
