playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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