I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize