He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
