I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
