okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
