Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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