mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize