I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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