we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize