I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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