this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
