i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
