i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
