Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
