So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
