I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
