I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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