would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
