My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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