me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
