$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize