I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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