i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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