Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
vagina is talking i cant
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
My vagina is officially offended.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
