So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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