Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i drank out of a bidet.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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