Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
home. puking in laundry basket.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
