i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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