R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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