Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I wish you could order shots online.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
