Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
