were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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