I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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