then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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