doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize