the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
