too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
