Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
