So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
