Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
