Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Just high enough for therapy.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
