Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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