Rock
Scissors
Fuck
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
