i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
